Rachel’s sweet and sour

Rachel’s sweet and sour tonight was:

“My sweet is that Daddy has to go to a meeting.
My sour is that my Mommy stayed home all day.”

Well, we both made it into Rachel’s sweet and sour today.  I laughed hard…and then the song that came into my mind was:

“I’m so glad that Daddy has to go
Glad as I can be…”

Happy Easter!

Rachel’s thinking “What kind of a silly hat are you wearing?”

Highlights of our Easter:

• Easter baskets–the bunny brought candy and scooters for each of the girls
• Dinner with my parents, grandma, sister, and her kids
• Finding out some interesting information from my grandma that I did not know before*
• Church–listening to beautiful songs, lessons, talks, and testimonies of my Savior

*My grandma served a mission in the Western States mission before she married my grandpa.  I asked her how many sisters were in her mission at the time (assuming there probably weren’t many) and she surprised me by saying there were 10-12.  That was more than I had anticipated.  Then she surprised me again by saying there weren’t any elders.  WHAT!?!? I said.  She told me that the Church was not calling elders at the time–World War II was going on.  So the men were tied up with the war or the draft.  However, as she was transferring from Denver to New Mexico, the Church sent the first group of elders to their mission. For a while, all of the missionaries met together for dinners and meetings.  And part of that group was a handsome young man that would later become my grandfather.  They saw each other a few times before Grandpa left for Nebraska and Grandma left for New Mexico, but really met and became acquainted later at a mission reunion in Salt Lake.

Half vacation

Scott and I live approximately six miles from both sets of parents.  It’s so convenient for many reasons–one of them being that when our siblings come to visit our parents, we get to see them as well!  This past week, both of my sisters were in town so it was a family reunion in a way.  My girls had a lot of fun going over most days to see their aunts and cousins (and of course, grandparents).  My grandma also came to visit.

Even though there are a lot of conveniences living close to my parents, one disadvantage is that all last week I felt like I was on a half vacation.  We spent most of the day over at my parents’ house, but then we would come home, eat dinner, sleep, breakfast, and then head back over.  The house still got messy, there was still meal prep and dish clean-up, I didn’t take as much time to clean as I usually would and the laundry still had to be done.  So spending all my days over at my parents’ house led to general messiness at my house  (which hopefully doesn’t happen if you are really out of town.)

Another disadvantage (which could be construed as an advantage depending on how you look at it) is that we don’t usually spend the nights there.  So we get left out of the adult conversation and sometimes games that happen after the kids go to bed and the kids get left out of spending the night at Grandma’s house.  However, this is also an advantage.  We get to sleep in our own beds (which are always superior to sleeping anywhere else because they are the ones we are used to), and my kids are with me in my own home.  So I know that they are safe and close.

I wouldn’t have it any other way really.  I feel blessed that we live so close and that my  kids get to develop relationships with their grandparents that I didn’t get to develop with mine.

One of our favorite toys

Katie and I pulled out the blocks today that she received as a birthday present one year from her grandma (maybe her second?  or third?  I really can’t remember now.)  And I was reminded how much I like these blocks.  They are painted really fun colors and the best part are the little animals and people.  Whoever painted them was really creative!  The idea is really simple–the animals and people are both made out of wood doll heads or pegs that can be found at a craft store.  So if I was that creative or patient, I could make my own.

And I love watching Katie and Rachel construct buildings and imagine what the people are doing.  Rachel is more into building towers and she loves it when Scott or I build a tower and then she gets to knock it over.  Katie really likes to build houses and put the people and animals inside it.  Today Katie and I built a bridge with a pathway leading to it.  I tried to put the dog under the bridge, but she told me what there was water there.  She was ok with the duck under the bridge because ducks can swim.

Spring is coming…

At least that’s what I tell myself. I was really excited at the end of February when it started to get really warm.  But then it snowed and it has stayed pretty cold since then.  However, the sun was out this afternoon and although it was a bit chilly, we went outside for some fresh air.  The girls had a good time swinging.  Then after dinner, we went for a quick walk.

And my starts for my garden are coming up.  I just love watching the new plants stick their heads up from the dirt.  Here’s to hoping for lots of beautiful flowers and delicious vegetables this year!

Daily Family Traditions

Play everyday…sometimes with blocks (as above), or sometimes store, camping, airport, hospital…any number of highly imaginative games.

Wake girls up (usually)

Read scriptures

Pray

Eat breakfast together (and dinner)

Read stories after scriptures and before bed.  (I usually read one to one girl and Scott usually reads one to the other.)

See if the dog around the corner (his name is Bear) is there everytime we drive past.  And if he’s not, he’s usually eating a “teddy bone” for lunch.

Wave at daddy every morning and flash the outside porch light at him as he rides his bike to work.

When Daddy gets home, the tradition is to either squeal and run to the garage door or squeal and hide from him.

Parenting tips: The Essential Things

“These are essential things which must be done before nonessential things. These are simple, indispensable practices that almost seem mundane when we talk about them… No one can do these things for us—these are personal practices and habits that set us apart as strong and immovable for that which is correct.”  (Sister Julie B. Beck, General Relief Society meeting, October 2007)

“Some uses of individual and family time are better, and others are best. We have to forego some good things in order to choose others that are better or best because they develop faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and strengthen our families.”  (Dallin H. Oaks, October 2007  General Conference)

Four things which are essential to strengthening home and families:

Family Home Evening

Every Monday night.  And make sure each one includes gospel instruction.

Meaningful Family Prayer

Twice a day.  President James E Faust in the October 2005 Ensign of an experience that a bishop had with President Kimball.

“Years ago, Bishop Stanley Smoot was interviewed by President Spencer W. Kimball (1895–1985). President Kimball asked, ‘How often do you have family prayer?’  Bishop Smoot answered, ‘We try to have family prayer twice a day, but we average about once.’ President Kimball responded, ‘In the past, having family prayer once a day may have been all right. But in the future it will not be enough if we are going to save our families.’”

Family Scripture Study

Each child has their own copy of the scriptures with a marking pencil.  The scriptures are a workbook.  Each child should also have their own copy of the General Conference Ensign and there should be family home evenings taught of that.

Temple Attendance

Attend regularly and consistently.

The parenting class teacher encourages us to do, with exactness, those four things.  I first took this class a year ago (yes, it is my second time in the class…and if you think I need to retake it, just know that there are others that have been attending 5+ years!) and I have to admit that I have made great strides in those four areas–I am not quite to the exactness part, but I have improved immensely.

How I am doing:
Family Home Evening–we are pretty consistent and usually have gospel instruction.  I would like to add more lessons coming from talks from General Conference.
Meaningful Family Prayer–we do alright at night prayers, but we could improve our morning prayers (like actually have them) and improve the “meaningful” part.
Family Scripture Study–We do great at reading…but we should improve the “study” part.  Occasionally we ask the girls questions about what we read.  I am going to improve my efforts when checking for understanding and application.  (See this post about understanding and application.)
Temple Attendance–This is the area where I have seen the biggest improvement in myself.  Thanks to several friends who have helped me get there by inviting me and being so consistent when going.

One year ago

Look at how little Rachel was!  I can’t believe that only one year ago she looked that small.  And those cheeks!  So cute.  I am already mourning that my girls grow so fast.  I tell them that they have to stay little forever.  But I have to be careful how often I say that because Katie gets sad.  I’m sure she is having an internal battle–wanting to grow big, but wanting to please her mommy.  The last time I said it, Katie started to get sad and said, “But mom!  I want to be big!”  So I had to assure her that I wanted her to be big too.  And that’s true…I do want her to grow up and learn to do things herself because that is Heavenly Father’s plan.  But there is a part of me that grieves when I look back at these pictures.

(Katie doesn’t look she has changed that much)

I’m sure that is part of being a mom…I have heard many moms talking about how they miss their kids when they are all at school and how when the last one goes to college it takes some time to adjust to that.  So I know I am not the only one who mournes as the children grow.

It makes me think of President Monson’s talk from last General Conference, “Joy in the Journey.”  He says, “If you are still in the process of raising children, be aware that the tiny fingerprints that show up on almost every newly cleaned surface, the toys scattered about the house, the piles of laundry to be tackled will disappear all too soon and that you will–to your surprise–miss them profoundly.”

What’s the key to finding joy in my journey?  I found it in President Monson’s talk:  “Our realization of what is most important in life goes hand in hand with gratitude for our blessings.”  Gratitude…that I have had two beautiful girls who keep me laughing and loving every day of my life.  And the other key?  (This one is not in President Monson’s talk…it is loosely based on The Family: a Proclamation to the World, paragraph 7) Making memories with them.  Finding time to spend every day playing or doing something fun together creates memories that I’ll have forever even if I won’t have Katie at four years old and Rachel at two.  And of course, I take lots of pictures and my goal to start using our video camera more during everyday activities at our house.

Speaking of everyday activities…have you heard of this?  You take pictures of your daily activities on the 12th day of every month for a year.  I think I might try it…it would be a great way to document your everyday life.

Valentine’s mailboxes

The other day, Katie and I made Valentine’s mailboxes for each person in our family, with the idea being that we could write little notes of love and appreciation to each other before Valentine’s Day.  It was something I have thought about doing for a while, but thought that I wanted to make them really cute and creative.  So I went back and forth in my mind trying to decide how to make them really beautiful.  Finally, I decided that instead of trying to make them time consuming and expensive, I would just use what we had around the house.

So Katie and I pulled out the construction paper, crayons, glue, and glitter.  Katie picked the color of the paper for each person, wrote their name on it (except mine), and drew a picture of each person.  I helped fold the bottoms of the paper up to make an opening for the notes, and helped glue and glitter the hearts.

And you know, I think they turned out cute.  I think it was better to let Katie have a little free reign of creativity…the original idea of mine would have been controlled by me…and I would have been more stressed if she didn’t do it the way I wanted her to…especially if I had bought supplies.  This way, I wasn’t stressed, and Katie could do what she thought looked good.

Here are the final products:

I’m learning that I usually try to make things more complicated than they should be.  I paralyze myself with analyzing what other people might think.  While these “mailboxes” could have been made by a much more creative person, they fulfill a fun tradition in our home that would not have come about if I stressed about how they might have been cuter.

And they have already served their purpose (I think.)  I wrote Katie and Rachel each notes and they have both talked on and on about what I had written them.  In Katie’s I told her how much I loved the way she pretended to camp with Rachel the other day.  And in Rachel’s I wrote about how I loved to hear her sing.  Then I drew a picture of each girl and the activity they were doing.  Rachel kept getting her note and showing me her picture saying, “Look!  I’m singing!”

What went wrong and what went right.

Towards the end of yesterday, I was starting to get discouraged.  The girls had been fighting, disobeying, yelling at each other, and not using their nice words when they talked to me or each other.  I didn’t get as much done as I had hoped.  And what I had done, didn’t seem to be what I wanted to do.

What went wrong:  I burned dinner.  And this is after talking to my sister about how she thought she was burning her dinner.  Dang power of suggestion.

What went right:  Scott was late coming home–that’s not what went right–but it did give me more time to make dinner again so at least it was edible.

What went wrong:  The girls seemed to be at each other all night.

What went right:  But not all night.  They did spend some happy moments pretending they were at the hospital.  In this picture above, Rachel is the “hospital helper” and Katie is getting checked.  I love when they pretend together.  As I write this, they are taking all the pillows we have to make a “cupcake” with frosting on the top.  (This is just stacking all the pillows up.)

What went wrong:  I made a curtain to cover the DVDs on the entertainment center. It doesn’t hang the way I envisioned.  It is frustrating to work on something for an hour or so just to have it not work out as well as you hoped.

What went right:  I still like it.  I just need to figure out how to hang it so it doesn’t gather as much.

What went right:  Rachel helping me with dinner.  She was putting the potatoes in the pot for me.

What went right:  My back has loosened up enough that I don’t have to lay down every twenty minutes because it is hurting.

What went right:  Scott got home safe and sound, albeit a little later than usual, to a delicious, unburned dinner.

What went right:  Scott got home late because he has a lot to do at work.  (And that is a huge blessing right now in this economy.)

What went right:  We have a beautiful, healthy family.

What went right:  Because I was able to move more today than I have all week, my house is cleaner than it was earlier in the week.  (Not spotless, but way more clean.)

What went right:  Scott got home from his meeting in time to put the girls to bed.  They really miss him when he is gone.

The more I write about what went right, the more blessed I feel.  My mom had a quote on her fridge that I believe was from President Hinckley.  (I’ve looked for the exact quote, but I can’t find it–if someone knows where it is, let me know!)  “There are always more blessings than trials in this life.”